Divine Blessings on My Day of Birth

Feb 25

“Turning 40”

I recently turned 40, which I am grateful to reach this age in my life.

For the past couple of years I haven’t celebrated my birthday, where it has been quiet, I have spent moments with God and my children. Last year it dawned on me that I was going to be 40 I was thinking all sorts, what should I do to make it special etc. If it was five years ago I would have been planning a big 40th party with a DJ food, friends, family, alcohol etc. But my life has completely changed from five years ago I rarely listen to the same music I use to listen to, I can't even remember the last time I been to a club or a wine bar. It will be 4 years this year that I haven’t drunk alcohol. My whole social life has changed completely which I grieve for sometimes, but I wouldn’t change anything for the world.

Instead in the week running up to my birthday... I attended an online Inner Renewal Retreat with Ananda Sangha Worldwide to help me to go deeper with God with the worries of turning 40 and being alone (even though I knew I wouldn’t be alone, and I was with my children and that is how I trusted it to be). It felt like I should be doing something huge. Divine Mother shined her light and showed me the big gift that I was given which is Sushumna Chapel. I never thought in a million years that I would have my own Chapel and to be able to serve people in a unique creative way.

As I continue my Healing Journey with God I am grateful for the healing and transformation that has taken place in my life. I know my mum would be really proud of all that I achieved.

Turning my life around and saying I choose God Alone has not been an easy journey for me especially because of the lifestyle I used to live and the challenges I have faced in the world. Making friends with someone who is invisible poses a lot on your mental health and well-being.

Where questions of doubts and worries have come to me as:

God are you real?

Who are you?

How are you in everything?

How can I trust and have faith in silence when I can’t see you?

Psalm 94

That same day I came across a pamphlet and it was called Mental Health with God. Psalm 94:19-20 stood out to me and brought me comfort in the moment.

“In the multitude of my thoughts within me Thy comforts delight my soul.

Shall the throne of iniquity have fellowship with thee, Which frameth mischief by a law?”

Psalm 94:19-20 KJV

I thought I would share the whole psalm.

“O LORD God, to whom vengeance belongeth; O God, to whom vengeance belongeth, shew thyself. Lift up thyself, thou judge of the earth: Render a reward to the proud. LORD, how long shall the wicked, How long shall the wicked triumph? How long shall they utter and speak hard things? And all the workers of iniquity boast themselves? They break in pieces thy people, O LORD, And afflict thine heritage. They slay the widow and the stranger, And murder the fatherless. Yet they say, The LORD shall not see, Neither shall the God of Jacob regard it.

Understand, ye brutish among the people: And ye fools, when will ye be wise? He that planted the ear, shall he not hear? He that formed the eye, shall he not see? He that chastiseth the heathen, shall not he correct? He that teacheth man knowledge, shall not he know? The LORD knoweth the thoughts of man, That they are vanity. Blessed is the man whom thou chastenest, O LORD, And teachest him out of thy law; That thou mayest give him rest from the days of adversity, Until the pit be digged for the wicked.

For the LORD will not cast off his people, Neither will he forsake his inheritance. But judgment shall return unto righteousness: And all the upright in heart shall follow it. Who will rise up for me against the evildoers? Or who will stand up for me against the workers of iniquity? Unless the LORD had been my help, My soul had almost dwelt in silence. When I said, My foot slippeth; Thy mercy, O LORD, held me up.

In the multitude of my thoughts within me Thy comforts delight my soul. Shall the throne of iniquity have fellowship with thee, Which frameth mischief by a law? They gather themselves together against the soul of the righteous, And condemn the innocent blood. But the LORD is my defence; And my God is the rock of my refuge. And he shall bring upon them their own iniquity, and shall cut them off in their own wickedness; Yea, the LORD our God shall cut them off.”

Psalm 94:1-23 KJV

I then remembered a prayer by Swami Kriyananda that I have been practising on calmness…

Prayer

With Thee beside me, I know that the tides of trouble can never sweep me away.

Hold fast my hand, Lord; never let me go!

A Sharing of a Dream that I had on my Day of Birth

I had a dream that I was in a building “it looked like a high school corridor” I seen the face of Nayaswami Pranaba and then I started receiving text messages from Nayaswami Premdas (both Nayaswami’s reside at Ananda Village and are inspirational role models helping many people worldwide). As I continued walking down the corridor a door approached me and I went outside and I looked to my left I seen Nayaswami Jyotish sitting on a bench holding a drink in his hand like he was offering it to me (the drink looked like apple juice). As I went to walk to receive the juice Babaji's face appeared to me. His face was so large that I turned my direction and he guided me to walk into a forest and my dream ended.

I am not sure of the significant meaning of the dream completely, but this would be the second time I have dreamt Babaji guiding me into a forest. I also remembered when I travelled to the Amazon Rainforest and on the morning of the last day that I was leaving to go back home. I had a moment where I was watching an army of small tiny ants and then I was guided by spirit to walk into the unknown depths of the forest, feeling a strong presence to enter more further I became afraid of not finding my way back to the others who I travelled with so I turned back. I often wondered what would have happened if I would have trusted. Maybe it’s my time now and Babaji has come to guide me to trust in Mother Nature once again.

Healing

I am also grateful for a miraculous healing that took place which I didn’t even know about until my son pointed it out to me on my pictures. Here are the pictures below. In the pictures, you can see that I have a lump on the left side of my head and I am not sure where it came from or even how long I had it for. You can even see that it has affected my left eye too...

Sometimes I have looked at my self and thought have I had a stroke or have I suffered from this illness, but I have just get on with my life and tried to live me life as healthy as I can, and remove my self from negative environments, situations and the stresses of life.

From December I have been saying the affirmation by Paramhansa Yogananda

“I will with my own will, which flows from the divine will, to be healthy to be well,

to be prosperous and spiritual, to be well, to be well.”

Trusting my intuition and not really knowing why...

A Small Gift for Myself

A Small Gift for Myself I

I treated myself to a little statue of Ganesha. The shopkeeper who I purchased Ganesha from I have known her for a long time I have been buying items from her shop since my late teens. She sells spiritual items, crystals, incense, etc. I haven't visited her in a very long time, our meeting was like two friends who had been reunited after a long time of being departed from each other. She has been running her shop now for 35 years she told me. She asked me, have I been to India, I told her no.

She said to me… not a lot of people understand Indian Spirituality but she can tell that I do and that I should visit India one day. I smiled and thanked her, she also said to me that I can tell that I am a person who doesn’t moan and complain. When she said that to me I felt that Divine Mother was talking to me through her I didn't want to leave her shop as I felt the Indian Vibes strongly.

I have always wanted to go to India, before the pandemic I was actually in the process of looking for Yin Yoga Teacher Training Courses in India to become a yoga teacher. I always wanted to help Indian children and their families in some way. In my second degree of Reiki, I met a Sai baba Devotee, and during my training we would pray to Sai baba to help us in our group healing. I would receive dreams and messages from him.

In my later years, I came across a mentor who was a Sai baba devotee who helped me for a while. At the time I never knew that he was a Saibaba devotee until he shared that his guru Sai baba died which touch me deeply. He thanked me for helping his people in advance. I never knew what he meant by this...but it still remains with me...

I have always been fascinated by Indian spirituality. I never would have thought I had a connection with Sai baba, I would just meet his devotees. I have over 10 Paramhansa Yogananda books but I wouldn’t have said that I had a connection with him either. I have a collection of Osho books etc. I guess India's way of life has always been calling me and I have never known.

I will share one more thing before I complete... I have been wanting the book God Alone by Sister Gyanamata and the challenges I went through to get the book was unbelievable. I wasn’t able to purchase it here in the UK it wasn’t available on Amazon. I could only get it from SRF but their shipping price wasn’t worth it. I let the idea of buying the book go and then about a month later I looked online again and found it was available on Amazon UK New for £17.00 including delivery. I was really shocked about the price because it is currently being shipped all the way from New Delhi in India.

“ India has gifted and blessed me and I feel special and loved from Divine Mother”.

With all the blessings and all that I have learnt and still learning and have shared with you all today. God knows what we are thinking even in our mental distress, in our high expectations, even when we portray to our family, friends and the world that we are ok even when we are not. Even in the midst of our worries, Divine Mother shines her light. God promises perfect mental health and wellbeing, God promises comfort for mental health and distress, and God cares and loves us all the same.

All my feelings of loneliness and my questions had been answered my thoughts were dissolved, I was know longer separated and I merged into the silence of God's light, love and Divine Mothers' comfort. Which I am extremely grateful for.

In the Sushumna chapel, I have been guided to affirm and play on the harmonium the words from the Chant Desire My Great Enemy by Paramhansa Yogananda...

You won’t have to fear anything anymore, Night and day in Thy joy, oh my Lord.

Aum Peace Amen

Rev Dinah Pemberton